Wednesday, 20 August 2014

Look Facebook, it's not me, it's you....

I'm on the verge of a potentially messy break up.  Facebook and I have fallen out.  I am sick to death of people who I thought were sane and normal clogging my newsfeed up with ridiculous photographs and other such nonsense, suggesting that if I don't "like" said picture within six seconds of seeing it all the fairies will die. Yeah, laters fairies.

Worse are the FISHERS! People who have so little going on they have to attention seek through the medium of status updates. Phrases like "feeling a little broken hearted" creep up. Now firstly, in my opinion, you are either broken hearted, or you're not broken hearted at all. You can't be a little. That's like saying something is "a little bit unusual." It either is or it isn't, just decide! Secondly if you were truly, truly broken hearted and wallowing in a pit of despair I doubt the first thing on your mind would be to make sure the world and his wife were aware of your predicament via your pitiful status update. So you're not really any of the above are you? Right, so shush.

Nearly as bad are the Lurkers. They befriend and remain silent, just to the point where you forget about their existence. Then they smile smugly when you drop yourself in it. They obviously read every single flippin thing you do, see the photographs of you chucking yourself around after a few too many and then they make snippy little comments when they see you in real life. Show themselves up on the tinter'web though? Oh ho ho ho, no! Either join in, or get lost. Mmmmmkay?

I also have a problem with words like Unlike and Unfollow. Mostly because they're NOT REAL WORDS! Unhinged yes, and yes, I just might be close to being just that, unlike, no, no, no, no, NO. If you insist on dragging these faux-words into my daily life I think it only fair that I should be allowed to add a couple of my own: upsmash mother-hugging screenypops. I will, don't push me.

I have rules regarding Facebook friends. My biggest is my acceptance criteria: if I would happily go to the pub with you, sit opposite you and converse with you in the real world, then we can be friends. If you bullied me at school/met me once on a night out/once sat on the same bus as me, sorry love, but it's a no. Someone round here has to maintain standards!

I mean Facebook is great for keeping up with family and friends far away, but frankly so is Skype. And you're much less likely to irritate me with a stream of repost this message to fight depression/find a cure for cancer type/find the monster that called this puppy ugly nonsense on Skype.

So Facebook people, you're on your final warning. One more strike and you and I are quits. I mean it. Up-pull socks so they're flippin' undown!!

Tuesday, 19 August 2014

33/52

A portrait of my children, once a week, every week in 2014.

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A very happy Biscuit at her first football match.  Sadly it all went a little bit wrong shortly after this photograph was taken!

A cheeky Wiggles drives Mummy's car whilst sunny skies shine down on her.  Love her cheeky face beaming through the windscreen.

Apologies for the phone shots - it just happened that the things I wanted to record this week didn't seem to happen when I had my camera handy!

Happily joining in with Jodi at Practising Simplicity and this year's 52 Project.



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Monday, 18 August 2014

The Week That Was - Parks, Pukes and Rusty Nails....

Last week, my week went a little something like this:

Monday - It was a busy day for us!  Trina and her little boy and girl were coming over for lunch and to visit so we cleared up after the weekend then nipped to the shops to make sure we had enough for lunch for all of us.  They arrived and we had a lovely catch up and lunch before heading to the swings and to feed the ducks.  We came home and the children all watched Star Wars before they headed off back home.  The heavens opened and there was the most almighty thunderstorm and torrential rain.  I panicked and made our tea ridiculously early so that the power didn't go off in the middle of cooking (happens all the time in small villages).  Thankfully we made it ok!

Tuesday -  My car was due at the garage for its annual service and MOT so I packed up our bags for the day and Wiggles, Biscuit and I stopped it off and headed off to the park. We were met by Tilly and Em and Lucky, Belle and Dinky who were fresh back from their holiday. I'd missed them so much!!! We had a lovely time at the park together. The children played in the sand and we had lovely coffee and cake made by lovely Lucky. 






I did my best at a little photo bombing and ended up looking like Superwoman!!!

We has fish and chips for lunch followed by more playing before we picked the car up and headed home. In the evening Mr Husband and I went to the shops to buy a few essential bits and bobs. Oh yes, and ice cream!

Wednesday - Work for me. Ugh. LB clef in with her poorly leg, it was lovely to see her. At lunchtime I went to H&M to get a security tag taken off a t-shirt Mr Husband bought on Friday. I nipped to M&S to buy some cake ready for Crafty Stella's visit on Thursday. Apart from that, very dull! 

Thursday - Got up and tidied up, then after lunch we were joined for tea and cake by Crafty Stella and her two gorgeous girls. We had a good chat and a lot of cake, which is always a good sign, right? In the evening I had an early night and watched iplayer in bed (bliss) while Mr Husbabd watched Thor. 

Friday - Work for me, my lovely friend Lynne gave me a bottle of perfume (which I love) that she wasn't sure was "her". I couldn't have been more chuffed!!! 

At lunchtime I bought a gorgeous black dress from Monsoon in the sale.

After work I joined my Mum and Dad (who were in town for dinner) for a non-alcoholic cocktail. Look at this puppy!! 



I came home to a lovely tea cooked by Mr Husband. He is a sweetheart, so I treated him to this:

Saturday - my turn for a sleep, then a lovely long bath followed by cooked breakfast (mmmmm). Biscuit was very excited because she was going with Daddy to her first ever football match.  He'd promised her an Arsenal shirt and a car picnic on the way home.  She had sweets for half time and had been counting down the days with excitement.  They headed off and around an hour later Mr Husband rang me to say that Biscuit had been sick all over the back seat of the car.  I spoke to her and we put it down to travel sickness (not something she's ever really suffered from) and we'd decided that she should probably be ok to go ahead and continue.  Just as I was saying goodbye to them Wiggles stood directly in front of me and threw up all over me!  Ugh!  The smell is never a good thing is it?  Thankfully my Dad was on hand to help and I cleared up whilst he hosed poor Wiggles down.  Strangely she seemed fine and was running around nose diving into sofa cushions so after a  little while Mum and I decided to chance it and take her with us to a local vintage fair.  It was lovely.  We headed back without incident.  I had a Rusty Nail in a vain attempt to kill any germs that might have been hanging around in my system!!




We then discovered that poor Biscuit had been sick from the moment she entered the football ground and didn't even make it to her seat!  Thankfully the Emirates stewards and St John's Ambulance people were wonderful and took her and Mr Husband off to a First Aid room until she'd recovered enough to make the journey home.  When she eventually got in she went straight to bed.  I went to KFC to buy poor Mr Husband a treat to cheer him up after a pretty rotten and disappointing day.

Sunday - Mr Husband's turn for a sleep.  After he got up I went out to tackle the sicky car, which thankfully wasn't as bad as I had anticipated.  Mr Husband went to the supermarket and came back with yummy lunch and a bouquet of flowers for me to thank me for the car cleaning and the KFC mercy dash - bless him!!  Poor Wiggles and Biscuit spent the day on the sofa wrapped in the poorly blanket watching films. 




 In the after I had started to go a little stir crazy so insisted that Mr Husband and I go out for a least a walk.  It was lovely to get out in the fresh blustery air.  In the evening I decided to go for my first ever run!  I'm not even going to pretend that I don't feel pretty smug about this turn of events.  In truth it was more of a sweaty walk than a run, but I did it!  I came back and collapsed on the sofa with my jelly legs and scoffed a Magnum Gold to recover.  A girl's gotta have some perks, right?

Well that was mine, how was yours?

Love, love,

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Monday, 11 August 2014

32/52

A portrait of my children, once a week, every week in 2014.

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My children are not little airbrushed, filtered balls of perfection.  Wiggles is a perfect case in point.  This week's picture captures her the way she often looks, messy of hair, runny of nose, grubby of t-shirt, but happy, smiley and content.

Another shot of Biscuit trying out new things this week and concentrating hard in the process.  Swinging from the bars she didn't know I was watching her!


Happily joining in with Jodi at Practising Simplicity and this year's 52 Project.



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The Week That Was - Friends and Amigos...

Last week, my week went a little something like this:

Monday - For some reason I woke up pretty late (8am) I'm not sure how I managed this as Wiggles was not being exactly quiet!  We had breakfast and I did the usual tidy around.  The girls watched a bit of TV whilst I tried on some potential outfits for an upcoming wedding. We decided that we'd have lunch at home before heading out for the afternoon to some different swings (for a nice change) after Wiggles had enjoyed her nap.  The sun was shining but it wasn't toooo hot so the swings were a lovely place to be, I think they really enjoyed themselves.  I was chatting to a lovely lady from Colorado who was on her holidays with her Husband and five children, she was lovely and it was a really nice afternoon.







Eventually we had a walk around the nature reserve before heading home to see Daddy and make tea.

Tuesday -  We woke up, tidied up (yet again) and made oat, raisin and honey cookies before heading next door to Jill's house. The girls played really beautifully and I was dead proud. We stayed for a spot of lunch, which was lovely. We headed home for Wiggles to nap. Once she woke up we went out for a walk then scooted to the supermarket to buy ladies fizzy wine, hurrah! 

Wednesday - Should have been a work day for me, but Mum was poorly with 
food poisoning (poor thing) so I had to change my working day this week. We made sure Mum was ok, took the dog for a walk then came back for lunch and a nap (Wiggles, not me). After she woke up we went to meet Tallulah in a nearby park and had a lovely couple of hours in the sunshine. 




We came home, had tea and Mr Husband cooked us pigs in blankets as a delicious nibbly snack, mmmmm :) 

Thursday - Because Mum was poorly I swapped my day and went into work. I spent pretty much the entire day thinking it was Wednesday! 

Friday - A day off with my lovely husband! I went to pick up a dress I'd ordered first thing, then when we headed off together to town. We did some shopping, Mr Husband booked a tattoo appointment (yay) and I had a bra fitting at Marks and Spencers. We bought some more clothes for Mr Husband then went to have lunch. We opted for Mexican. It was YUMMERS and lovely to spend done time with one another alone. 




Fell a bit in love with this beer!!! I  am obsessed! Later on lovely Mr Husband bought me a fab jacket, bless him. We picked my Dad up from the station on our way home and gave him a lift home. I nipped back out to the supermarket and bought some more tequila beer and some ice cream, yay! Proper lovely day. 

Saturday - I woke up late (my lay in, yay) and had a lovely bath. My parents and brother had gone to London for the weekend so the house seemed lovely and quiet.  I had a lovely hot bath and afterwards walked Pearl the Pug and Wiggles round to the paper shop in our village to sort out a problem with my Mum's newspaper bill (she thought she'd underpaid).  Whilst I was there the lady that runs the shop was having a mini meltdown because her delivery people hadn't turned up.  To cut a long story short we ended up delivering some of the local newspapers to help her out and in exchange Wiggles was very pleased to receive a Barbie Easter Egg!  In the afternoon we went over to Mr and Mrs Small's house to attend their pre-wedding celebration, which was lovely.  We came home late (9pm - after the children's bedtime) but happy at having spent a lovely afternoon with friends.

Sunday - I woke up early and took care of the children and Mum's dogs before Mr Husband joined us.  He took Biscuit to the cinema and Wiggles and I spent the afternoon together.  The weather was fairly terrible and as soon as it stopped raining we nipped out for a quick walk and some fresh air.  We bumped into Impressive D and then Impressive E who told us that they were due to exchange on their house move on Tuesday so they'd spent their weekend moving stuff into their new garage in readiness - exciting hey?  We came home and had a lovely Sunday lunch together all four of us and then an early night because we were so sleepy from the night before.

Well that was mine, how was yours?

Love, love,

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Monday, 4 August 2014

31/52

A portrait of my children, once a week, every week in 2014.

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Another trip to the park, this time further away from home.  Biscuit tries out her new-found adventurous spirit by attempted the slide via the least obvious route.  I love how she's spied me, but can't break her concentration.  Wiggles sits and plays happily in the sunshine.  Everything is a toy to her, wood chips, her own feet, her shadow.  She's quite gleeful here, chatting away to herself and having a marvellous time.

Happily joining in with Jodi at Practising Simplicity and this year's 52 Project.



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The Week That Was - Waging War on Weeds....

Last week, my week went a little something like this:

Monday - After a quick house tidy first thing Wiggles, Biscuit and I set off for the park in a nearby town. We set up camp around a park bench and were joined by Impressive E, Woolly and Beetle, then Jill and Ned and Tilly and Em and eventually Mrs Robinson and Hank. We let the children play with the equipment and in the sand which they really enjoyed. At lunchtime we went to the fish and chip shop and all enjoyed some fish and chips in the sunshine.  




We stayed at the park for six hours, SIX HOURS! Dodging a rain shower and occasionally quaffing tea or an ice cream. We came home via the supermarket, Mr Husband played golf after work and I went to stitch and bitch with Jill whilst Mum looked after the small people.

Tuesday -  In the morning I made some cinnamon bran muffins before heading out to the park. We met Impressive E, Woolly and Beetle then Mrs Robinson and Hank joined us for a wee while. I sat chatting with Nark in the shade for a while, which was nice. People came and went and we just enjoyed being outside. Impressive E went home for sausages and we had sausage sandwiches and crisps for lunch. Tilly and Em joined us and we had a nice glass of wine before eventually heading back home another six hours later! We stopped off at the river to feed the ducks and dangled our feet in the cool water which was lovely. Such a relaxing couple of days! 



Wednesday - Work for me. Boring. 

Thursday - We spent the morning baking, washing and doing jobs around the house. 



After lunch and after Wiggles had a very brief nap we went up to the allotment and waged war on some weeds! We had to double back pretty much as soon as we arrived due to a nappy incident, but after that we stayed for a couple of hours and made some real progress. We came home and had some donated allotment runner beans for tea, which were yummers! After the children went to bed we whipped out to the supermarket for nappies and coffee. Life's essentials!! 

Friday - Work again for me. On the way home I collected a take away curry that Mr Husband had ordered that he'd been hankering after. It was good! 

Saturday - Mr Husband's turn for a lay in so we had coffee with my Mum and Dad. I mended a dress before Impressive E popped round with some bits for me. Woolly stayed and played with Biscuit for a bit whilst I cooked lunch, then I walked him back round to his Mum and Dad. After eating Wiggkes had her nap and Biscuit and I walked round to do some gardening. The children played beautifully together whilst I attacked the rhubarb bed and sorted it out. When we'd finished we all sat down a had a well earned beer (not the children) which was lovely in the sunshine. We came home and I made car-Brie-nara which was delicious! 

Sunday - My turn for a lay in, but I decided to get to early and soak my aching gardening bones in the bath.  We sat outside and had coffee in the sunshine with my Dad before I started on the lunch. We had allotment potatoes, green beans and beetroot which always makes me happy! I sorted out Wiggles' wardrobe and took out all her outgrown things ready to pass on to Dinky.  After eating lunch I drove over to meet my lovely friend Winky, who I haven't seen in ages. We had a really good catch up in the sunshine and it was lovely. So nice to see her again. 

Well that was mine, how was yours?

Love, love,

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